新聞國際服第一彈! International Service First Edition

Greetings! Welcome to International Service, First Edition. I am newhite.

Following is news of the week.


Heaven on Earth—Man’s Funeral with Strip Dancers


“Pa! You can grope from the coffin in you like!”
In a funeral in Taichung County yesterday, Mr. Tsai invited strip dancers as he promised his father, who was then 95 years old, that if he lived more than 100 years, he was going to have strip dancers at his funeral. His father died at 102. A promise is a promise!

"Everybody knew that my father loved this kinda stuff!”Papa Tsai often took trips around the island and to see strip dances. One time, he even traveled to Thailand for its world-famous“she-males.”

Before the funeral, Mr. Tsai, through a special ritual, asked his father if he still wanted to go with the strip dance idea. Ms. Tsai got three “affirmatives” from Papa Tsai in heaven. “Apparently, my dad insists that I do this for him.”

Harmless Scale: 七刀刀刀刀


http://tw.news.yahoo.com/article/url/d/a/080305/2/uo7m.html



The Clay Dragon Identity

In a tourist market in JiaYi, two vendors selling “clay dragon” (a kind of Chinese medicine that’s really good for you in winter) are struggling with their identities.

Mrs. Clay Dragon and Uncle Clay Dragon are both clay dragon vendors, and their booths happen to be right next to each others’. To many’s surprise, they are actually NOT a couple.
Mrs. Clay Dragon eagerly attempts to get it straight for us, “Mrs. Clay Dragon is of course married to Mr. Clay Dragon! How could my husband be Uncle Clay Dragon? If you’re Uncle Clay Dragon’s wife, people call you Auntie Clay Dragon! Right?”


Thank you very much for the clarification.

Harmless Scale: 七刀刀


http://tw.news.yahoo.com/article/url/d/a/080304/17/ulwf.html



Hotel Room Comes with Real-Time Police Action

A small hotel located in the suburb of Seattle might look like a regular hotel, but its selling point is indeed special. Customers there can watch patrol police arresting illegal immigrants on the border first-hand!

The owner says,” Our customers say they are very excited. The police alarm goes off every 3 to 4 minutes.”

Harmless Scale: 七刀刀刀
http://tw.news.yahoo.com/article/url/d/a/080305/17/uodj.html


Big Boobs A Problem In Relationship

A 30-year-old man in Chongqinq is 170 cm, but almost 90 kg. This man was introduced to a girl, who later became his girlfriend. But there’s one thing that the girl doesn’t like—the man is too fat.

His breasts are as big as hers. Some friends even say that he has bigger boobs, which totally pissed the girl off. So the girl issued an ultimatum—“Go through a “breast-shrinking surgery” or I ‘ll break up with you.” The man loved her too much, so he agreed to do it.

After the surgery, they are still very happy together. Apparently, the girl is very satisfied with the results.

Harmless Scale: 七刀刀刀刀刀刀

http://tw.news.yahoo.com/article/url/d/a/080305/1/uorv.html

This is the International Services. Thanks for watching and have a great day.